What matters most? Often people have a challenging time discussing important topics with their family because they’re afraid of how to approach the topic or what the outcome will be.
It is the elephant in the room, a difficult conversation, an unpleasant experience, a heavy cross to bear, to discuss what matters most although vitally important, so we offer a guide to having difficult conversations with our loved ones around what matters most when you aren’t there.
How do we have difficult conversations with the people we love so dearly?
The conversations about ageing and death are unquestionably the hardest to have but are the most vital to have. In the context of ageing parents, a shift occurs in the context of parent and child relationships; a child finds themselves stepping forward to support the parents. Most parents and children prolong and often avoid these conversations, but medical and financial responsibility must be addressed.
The important questions about; what will need to happen in regards to finances and important heirlooms they will need to be passed on and to whom?
Although uncomfortable and confronting to some, many older adults know exactly what they want in regards to end of life care and choices. Most families understandably put off having these important discussions, leaving adult children to make difficult decisions by themselves.
As National Palliative Care week is upon us, it is time to sit down with your family, in the next 30 days, nominate an advocate to work with you and help with legal necessities, start with responsible choices, an open-mind and diplomatic discussion.
Take the dialogue one step at a time; think about what happens when you aren’t able to speak for yourself anymore, what would you like and what needs to happen with you, in all aspects of your care? If you’re an older adult and your children are having a hard time discussing issues, get all legal matters taken care of and send them an email with bulleted points on everything you’ve done.
Having the important discussions and making a plan before the event happens, ensures you are able to have an opinion and be heard no matter what happens. Being able to have a voice in our family and interpersonal relationships; allows a smooth supported transition from being your own advocate, your choices being respected and included in all aspects of your care.
By preparing today, it will let be heard forever.
Be sure to check your local government website for Advanced Care Directive Plans.
NSW – How to make an Advanced Care Directive Plan
Everyones’ goodbye is a unique rite of passage, here at Olsens you can speak with our friendly staff, in our comfortable offices about future planning. We can do as much or little as you would like, an informal discussion or more formal arrangements such as prepaid funerals are both possibilities. We have the time and expertise to help guide families through this journey at a gentle pace. We are collaborative with you, so everyones’ final wishes can be heard; contact any of our Olsens staff to discuss your final farewell.